Selfish Mama Matters

1.03 - Determining Your Own Definition of Success with Jenn Jouhseik

Jenn Jouhseik Season 1 Episode 3

"Text us to share your feedback!"

In this episode, Jenn Jouhseik shares how her childhood beliefs set her up for always striving for the next thing and the next thing. That silent driver, coupled with the stressors of working in HR during the pandemic was the perfect storm for burnout. Despite her courage to leave to go out on her own, the childhood beliefs she thought she'd left behind in corporate surfaced again. In short, it's a story of burnout to entrepreneurship, back to burnout, and then finally to becoming...becoming more and more herself and having the courage this time to define what it means to truly be successful.

Jenn's loves using her writing talents and passion to elevate the brands of 7-9+ figure CEOs by crafting magnetic messaging & story-driven emails to help build connection and wealth. 

Guest: Jenn Jouhseik

Host: Tina Unrue

Jenn Jouhseik: I realized that I've been following someone else's definition of what success is. And so learning that and being aware of that has helped me kind of realize how I want carve my own way.

Welcome to the Selfish Mama Matters Podcast with your host, and my mom, Tina Unrue. 

Tina Unrue: Jenn, thank you so much for joining us. I am really excited to talk to you today. We've already been talking ahead of time, so I'm just so glad to dive into this discussion and to share your story with everybody here on the podcast.

So why don't you please introduce yourself, share your pronouns, and tell us how you're showing up in the world today.


[00:00:45] Intro
---

Jenn Jouhseik: Of course, I'm so happy to be here. I am Jenn Jouhseik.

Uh, she, her and I show up differently every day and I think that that is perfectly okay. Um, in terms of where I'm at now, it's been a while to get to this point, but I think that it's nice to know that it's comforting versus, um, anxiety filled. 

Tina Unrue: Oh my God. I think everybody just needs to take a breath after that one. 

Jenn Jouhseik: Yes.

Tina Unrue: Because not even just being on a podcast like that question can be kind of, performance inducing, right? Like, oh, what do I need to say, right, to have this crafted answer? But you so beautifully like stepped into your authenticity and then helped us know that the authenticity that you're kind of finding, or even maybe at best practicing right now, isn't always as it was. So why don't you tell us a little bit about that. What, what did life used to look like?


[00:01:57] Uncovering silent drivers and taking the wheel
---

Jenn Jouhseik: Oh, there's so many things, but I feel like, I I guess going back to corporate could be a point in life. When I was in corporate, I think and this kind of stemmed to childhood, I wanna say, where I had this pressure to do the best, be best, and to have this pedestal on my horizon, where every time I reached a certain goal, then there's the next level the next level, which is not a bad thing because I think that helps us grow.

But when you become so hard on yourself where if you don't reach the next level and don't meet that, you're not good enough. And that has been a constant thought that has hampered on me for a while, and created anxiety and depression over the years, to figure out what success is. 

And recently I was brought with the question, what does success mean to you? And I've been been thinking about that for a long long time. And I realized that I've been following someone else's pre-programmed definition of what success is. And so learning that and being aware of that has helped me kind of realize how I want carve my own way.

And so I am still working on it. It's, it's a work in progress every day. But I am finally in a good place where I feel okay about everything. Even though when things are crashing down, it's fine.

Like I, I think being able to look at things more optimistically and that everything happens for a reason, there's an opportunity rather than looking at it at, at a downside, has been super helpful in moving forward and finding a flow and taking, even if it's the smallest step, just moving in a good direction.

You just said so much that think a lot of us resonate with. I know I do. What you said about childhood kind of always having that next thing that you're trying to strive for and it makes so much sense if you actually think about it. Not to say that it's okay, but just kind of framing it from how we are all ushered through life. Mm-hmm. 

Tina Unrue: Like when you're a kid and your parents are just usually, for the most part, trying to set you up for success, and they're trying to kind of force upon you what they either didn't have or couldn't have or what they think is required, right? And there's all these, societal norms, cultural norms, personal beliefs, it is all just fancifully bundled into this, framework that we're given for childhood. 

And when we're kids, we're just waiting to go to preschool and then then we're we're in elementary and then we're in middle school, and then we're in high and then we're in college, and then we're either going to graduate school or we're getting the job and then getting married.

There's always these then and then and then. 



Tina Unrue: And then at some point the thens almost stop. And we either start to craft our next then, or we allow it be crafted for us. 

Someone posed question to you about what does success look like, and it just made you pause.

How fascinating is that? When we are kinda invited to sit in the driver's seat and be like, wait a minute, what, what does this look like? 

So I'm taking it that you are no longer longer in corporate. 

Jenn Jouhseik: I am not. I decided to leave my job mid-pandemic and create my own business without anything lined which was very scary andyeah, it was terrifying. I felt like I was disappointing everyone around me because why would I leave a stable job to do something completely different and not have anything secure there?

And it was just hard. But I knew I had to do it because in corporate, I did go through massive burnout that I didn't recognize at first. Actually, my husband had kind of brought it to my attention that you can't operate like this anymore. Um, I ended up getting crippling anxiety attacks that I had to go on medication for.

And one day my dog had found me on the staircase. I was crying before work and he had brought my husband to me and he was like, you need to say something to your boss, or I will because this can't go on anymore. 

And so it was a very pivotal moment for me to kind of like wake up and, and realize that it's not okay. As a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser, I have gone through the motions of just being on autopilot. I do what I need to do. I keep taking on. I help where I can and I don't realize what it does to me and I don't speak up about it. And so it was a really big wake up call and I was able to talk to my boss about it, who she has been amazing through the whole thing. She was like, you know what? This job is not worth it. Your health is more important. And she told me to go on a personal leave. And during that time is when I discovered my true passion, which evolved into my business going back to writing. And this has always been something I loved since I was little, but going through the motions of society saying you can't be a writer. It's not sustainable long term. Like, you know, what are you gonna do with an English degree? And so when was in college, I had transferred over a business school went down a list majors and I picked human resources as my major. And I went with that was my career for six years. I got certified by SHRM and everything, but I didn't love it. And I think that that all like coming together started to bring me back to like, what does success mean to me and what do I want in life versus what is right or what other people think is right for me.

Tina Unrue: Well, kudos to your pup.

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah.

Tina Unrue: Right. I mean, we talk about support systems here on this podcast, but that's a new level of support. That's pretty awesome. I like it. I like it.

Um, so not only did you have support from your pup and your husband, but also your boss, how fantastic is that? To be able to give you the space to take leave and figure things out. 


[00:08:39] The importance of speaking our truth
---

Jenn Jouhseik: It's interesting because, this is something that's super important, I think for all of us to know. People might be going through the same motions as you, and if you're not communicating it, no one knows. And so when I expressed my burnout to my boss, she had no idea because on the surface level, I was fine. I was perfect like I was, no worries, like no stress, but inside I was falling apart.

And for me to tell her that, it made her realize that she was going through the same thing and she thought that because I looked fine, that it was all in her head. And so we both resonated with each other. That the fact that we were both very burnt out. And it blossomed to the point where we both left the company on the same day. 

And it, yeah, it was insane. We were the entire department and we both left and it such a relief off our shoulders to be able to do that. And it took that one conversation to be able to ignite it. And I think that that's really powerful. 

Tina Unrue: Thank you so much for pausing to share that because it is incredibly important. I think kind of like you said, we, we have a lot of these tendencies or traits that we develop subconsciously,

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm. 

Tina Unrue: most oftentimes in our childhood. And at some point I feel like we're called to kind of wake up to them. 

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah. 

Tina Unrue: And reselect them if that's what you choose, but to do so from a conscious perspective.

And you weren't re-choosing them. You wanted desperately to change them. And it takes incredible courage to be vulnerable and kind of show up as our truest selves with someone else. And just say, hey, this is what's going on. And we have no idea how they're gonna take it and what's gonna happen, right? 

Jenn Jouhseik: Yes. 

Tina Unrue: And so not only did you have the courage to do that, and you did it selfishly, my favorite word, of course. But this is also what I love about selfishness because I, if I do anything with podcast, I want people to redefine what it means to be selfish.

Selfish just means the root of the word to be more like yourself. That is it. I don't care as to the origins of the word and how somehow over time it evolved into some negative connotation about how being selfish like ourselves has to be at the detriment to someone else.

It does not. It does not.

You honored yourself. You had self regard in that moment. And then look at the beautiful outcome. Not apparently for your ex-employer, but for the wellbeing of two women.

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm.

Tina Unrue: Two, probably very hard charging, ambitious women who realized, oh wait, this is, this is really not serving me in the way that I thought it was serving me. You know what I mean? 

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah, yeah.


[00:11:57] The contributing factors of burnout
---

Tina Unrue: It is so very true. When we show ourselves, then we give permission or like the doorway opens for others to do the same or resonate with our story.

You had the signs of burnout. You were just lots of anxiety. What do you attribute that to though? Was it just because you feel like the HR work wasn't fulfilling, or was it too high of a demand?

Tina Unrue: Can you help shape more of the burnout symptoms and and why you feel like you were having them? 

Jenn Jouhseik: It was a multitude of things. So one, HR wasn't something that was fully fulfilling for me just because it was something I kind of just picked off of the list to do and that I could do comfortably.

So I did have a creative outlet to help me through all of that, which was social media influencing and blogging, which allowed me express that creative side of content creation and writing and doing all the things that it felt good for me, but it just was enough to keep me, I guess it was like a lifeline sort of throughout corporate. But aside from that, I think it's also the nature of the role.

HR is the liaison between company and the people. But with COVID happening and everyone going remote, morale being down and HR kind of taking the brunt of like trying boost morale, trying to get people engaged while at home, and everyone dealing with all the emotions that came with the pandemic, while also being on the side of the company who had to either let people go and all of that stuff. It just came together. 

Jenn Jouhseik: Um, and I think that that required just so much extra mental capacity that I didn't have, on top of the, the physical, like doing the work and, you know, just pouring hours into work. Like I started working a lot of overtime trying to like be able to do all these things. So it was a mix things, I think. And definitely being isolated at home, that didn't help. 

Um, I had also moved to a different state, during COVID. So I'm originally from New York and we had packed our bags and moved to Austin without ever visiting, without knowing anyone here, and we just did it because we wanted to get out of the city, and it was great, but it was very isolating because not only was everything shut down, we didn't know anyone. And being home bound, it was really hard. 

And while I was going through the burnout of work and not feeling fulfilled and all of it kind of came crashing down together, and so, it was rough, it was trying to keep up. I felt like I was a zombie on autopilot trying to just do all the things. I didn't feel comfortable voicing it. I felt like this is just life and I'm just going through life. And even though I'm tired or I didn't have energy to really socially talk to people or anything like that, it was just, yeah, autopilot.

Obviously it wasn't great on mental or physical or emotional side. And um, there comes a breaking point and I hit that breaking point.

Tina Unrue: Yeah. I mean, I think you brought really an excellent point for hopefully listeners to tap into, which is the fact that burnout is, eerily silent yet not. 

The whispers are almost so low that we don't detect it until it becomes much louder and much more significant, right. It can culminate over time or kind of like you even said, even not just time, but just different circumstances. 

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm. 

Tina Unrue: And different kind of inputs coming together into the perfect storm.

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah.

Tina Unrue: So I'm glad that you obviously were able to have some time to be able process what was going on. And you left corporate and you said it felt like an incredible relief.

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm.


[00:16:22] When the lesson lingers 
---

Tina Unrue: And you were able to tap into kind of a, a passion, I guess, that you had pursued when you were younger and probably would have chosen to, major in in college if it felt like it was more lucrative. So now you get to return to this passion. So, how has your life or your approach to work changed now that you are post corporate?

Jenn Jouhseik: So to be very honest, I took alot of what I was groomed to be used to incorporate into entrepreneurship. So when I started my business, I didn't have anything lined up, but it was a, felt like because it was something that I was passionate about, it didn't matter how much work I put into it, it didn't feel work. And I think that that while a good thing, it also led to a different type of burnout down the road, which kind of evolved from pouring your passions into something so much that you start losing grasp of having a balance in life. And I think that that is something that not a lot of people talk about. I was able to create a really successful business, which I didn't imagine I would in a short amount of time, which was amazing. But it pushed me to grow as a person.

I'm, I'm an ambivert. I call myself an ambivert, and I'm, I could be extroverted and I could be introverted. I'm primarily introverted, but, I've learned that I have to put myself out there in order to grow the business. And that was very scary because it didn't feel comfortable. Even though I was excited about it, it was like the, my social battery was drained alot. 

Jenn Jouhseik: And so kind of working through those motions of doing all of that on top of doing all the things, cuz when you create your own business, I'm sure some people, listening can resonate with this. It's like you don't know what you're doing. And it's kind of, you're going through the motions yourself and no one, there's no rule book, there's no guide, and you're kind of learning as you go or tripping as you go and, you know, getting back up. So, and it's lonely. It's really lonely. And being able to find people who can be a support system with you is wonderful. 

And, um, yeah, I, I went through another round of burnout because I pushed myself to work so much that I was not able to kind of... I, us usually would eat dinner with my husband and I was eating at my desk, and that's something that I used to do in corporate. I would eat through lunch. I wouldn't eat breakfast. Or I would just be on coffee all day and I would be working hours and hours and hours, probably even more than corporate.

And I just didn't have a life anymore. It was like the work took over and I constantly said yes to everything that came through the door. I didn't know how to say no. I didn't know how to have boundaries and setting personal boundaries that I could stick to. It just snowballed into this whole thing that ended up making me hate what I was doing which didn't feel good at all because something that I loved then turned into a chore. and something that I just dreaded. 

So I had to again, take a step back and that's kind of where I found, like redefining what success was. Cause I realized what I was doing was rooted back in childhood where set a bar. And once I meet that bar, now the bar is higher, and then I have to keep meeting the next bar. And when I don't meet it, I feel like I'm a failure. And that feeling of not being good enough was just a constant theme that I had to shake because that was just not doing anything good for my health, either way, it was just not good. 

And so, it was like a cycle until a point where I completely burnt out where my pipeline also dried up. I think I just didn't have energy to do anything. And that got me super depressed.


[00:20:47] The sweet homecoming
---

And then I started working on myself and I took that big step back. I started resting. I was getting maybe two to three hours of sleep a night. I changed that and I started focusing on me. I slept in, I started getting eight to nine hours a night. Working on a morning routine where I only give an hour to myself before I give it to else, to the devices, or anything like that.

Jenn Jouhseik: And that has helped really ground me and reshape how I feel and approach everything. And it's been really nice to do that because I feel way more balanced than I ever have been. And this whole anxiety around not having work lined up, turned from a negative to a positive, where I took it as an opportunity to work on my business and realized that the way that I was operating before wasn't sustainable.

How can I make it sustainable?

Tina Unrue: I have been working on really sitting down and thinking what direction do I want to go versus what do people say is the right direction. Amen.

Jenn Jouhseik: So it's been good. I feel really good. And so I'm taking it a day at a time. But it's been a great rollercoaster and I hope that that is helpful for anyone listening that with every new level, there's a new devil. And when you think you got it figured out and shit hits the fan, learning how to adapt is key and that is the most important thing.

Tina Unrue: For sure. You put a pin in the business and was like, okay, let me just step away for a minute and just kind of regroup, right? Recalibrate. And I don't think we do that often enough. I don't think we give ourselves permission enough to be able to say, time out. I, I need to do something different here or I need to pivot. I completely understand that there are situations and environments that make it much more of a challenge to do that. Single parents and things like that where they, they just don't have it as easy as compared to those of us who have structures and systems and people in place that can kind of support us through those changes, through those dynamics. But, but I think even temporary or brief or even momentary pauses to be able to say, let me just regroup.

I mean, as a mom, I do that all the time. Internally, when my brain is going and I wanna snap back at my teen when she's saying something or behaving in a way that I'm just like, okay, hold on. I want to scream at you right now. I can choose to pause. There are times when I'm able to catch myself in when I'm not, and that's just just one example of what I mean. Like we can can always choose to make that space between stimuli and response, a bit bigger if we need to as we can in order to help ourselves.

And so you did that. So congratulations to you for doing that because again, it's another courageous move. Like, look, it, it looked a certain way and I don't want it to look that way anymore.

Jenn Jouhseik: Right. 

Tina Unrue: And that's where the intentionality comes in too. 


[00:24:24] Sharing our truth benefits us and others
---

Jenn Jouhseik: I think a big part of it was that it's having these conversations. I didn't realize how deep I was in burnout again until I was at a conference where the speaker was telling us about his journey of burnout and he didn't realize how deep he was in until he couldn't get out of bed one day. Just no energy to do anything. And he got very sick from the burnout, but he was three years deep into the burnout didn't realize, and he only thought that he was maybe a few months in.

And so that made me do an internal check. How am I doing? Because I know that I'm operating at a level that probably isn't sustainable and that it, I'm gonna spiral back down into possibly not being able to do anything. And it's important to do those internal checks because you can't pour from and empty cup, especially when you have children or when you have people that rely on you for things.

And if you are not checking in with yourself and prioritizing yourself and being selfish, you can't help others because then when you're are down, who's going to pick up the pieces, right? So It, it's really important to do that and to take time, even if it's the smallest thing, like how you were doing your, you know, internal checks with yourself, like maybe catching yourself in a moment and taking breath or setting a boundary. Something that has helped me is that now every time I eat, I have to go downstairs and eat at a table away from the computer. And that has helped tremendously because I now disassociate work and eating as like one. And it's like those little small things that help and it just creates opportunity for you to be aware and be selfish.

Tina Unrue: Absolutely. And I, I will always reiterate this, which is, you know, we're taught that to be a good human, in essence, is to be selfless, to always do for others, and, you know, contribute. And, even, our purpose, we, we often hear that it's outside of ourselves. We're trying to find our purpose, right?

And I believe that all the answers are within us. 

So you stepping back and being able to focus on yourself, prioritize your health, regroup and create routines that really help you solidify and make time for what matters, not allow it. If there's enough time at the end of the day, maybe I'll be able to squeeze it in. Like mm-hmm. you prioritize it, right? You've, you've identified that this routine is necessary and it fills your cup in a way that allows you then to move more freely through the day. When we pay attention to our self regard in manner, when we are selfish, then I feel like that is our purpose. We are honoring whatever it is that we need.

We are giving ourselves, we are meeting our own needs. Giving it to ourselves, and then that allows us to kind of more easily have things overflow out of us, if that makes sense.

We are more apt, I think, to tap into the things that bring us joy, and then we do it from a more giving space as opposed to obligatory. 

Tina Unrue: So, would you say that you are still in a kind of self-reflective, introspective state as we speak, with how you wanna structure your days and what you wanna be doing in the world? 

Jenn Jouhseik: I I think it's been something that has definitely been incorporated in my routine of like thinking differently and taking a different perspective, on certain things, finding opportunities maybe where in a negative state I wouldn't have seen.


[00:28:37] The importance of being attuned to ourselves
---

Jenn Jouhseik: And so being really kind of self-aware of what feels good and what doesn't feel good, that has helped a lot. Sometimes, at least for me, when I'm coming across clients, the, the goal is to always, you know, have money coming in, of course. But if you're you're constantly saying yes to even the, the feelings that don't feel good, you have to break pattern.

And so to take a moment to reflect and see if this is alignment with what you want is important and being able do that and be aware of that helps a lot even with those around you. Like if someone's not feeling well and it kind of negatively impacts you, that's just a moment. Don't let it be the, the whole thing of the day, right?

When something bad happens, like a lot of us kind of, you know, shut down and they, like we say, oh, now the day's ruined, you know. And it's so easy to just say that, but it was just a small moment. Like, why did it make you feel that way?

What about it made you feel whatever emotion? If you could dig deeper into that, that will help you kind of realize like, maybe I just didn't like the way that they said certain things because back when I was a kid, I heard that phrase a lot. Or you know, something like that and that could he help you reflect and see what helps, in like moving forward and, you know, being able to see the, I don't wanna say too positive because there is like, the concept of toxic positivity.

Tina Unrue: Mm-hmm. 

Jenn Jouhseik: When you're just so positive all the time, even though feel it. But being in touch with your emotions I think is really strong. Especially with those around you, too, because sometimes you don't realize that you're blind to how you actually feel or how what you're doing is impacting others.

Um, there is one story that I wanted to share. Um, one of my, uh, copywriter friends who is also a Jen, she is a mother and she was working so much that her daughter felt that she was not giving her any of her attention or any time, and she just, all she did was work.

And so when she would send her daughter to school on the bus, she would always wave. And she stopped waving to her because she was like, you are not, not my mom. You're, you're working all the time. That's not my mom. 

And so that broke my heart. She realized that she had to cut back on her hours and give that time back her kids and make space for the important things. And sometimes we lose sight what those things are, even if it's the smallest thing.

And so now her daughter waves to her on the bus. And it's really nice to know that because I realized for myself, I started doing the same thing where I would work all the way through the night and not even have time to spend with my husband or my dogs or anything like that. And it impacts them and we don't think about it that way. But to be selfish also helps those around us and it's important.

Tina Unrue: It is. Thank you so much for sharing that. I think it's gonna resonate with a lot of moms, I think that's probably a mom's biggest fear, Is, having that experience where, their child just disconnects from them in that way.

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah.Yeah. 

Tina Unrue: in an emotional way. And I I think it's really difficult, you know, as a mom, I, I know the challenge of feeling like we have so much on our plates because we do, right? Whether you work outside of the home or not. Um, the more kids you have, obviously the harder it is. Pets a home, a partner. All of the extracurricular activities, just all of it.

It's just, there's always so much to do and I think that's, probably the biggest challenge that I see a lot for moms is how to quote unquote balance everything. And when I say balance, I don't clearly mean 50/50 or that everything's equal, even though I know that's what the word is defined as or insinuates.

But I think it just means more, and I hate the other terms that they use now. Integration and harmony.

Right. I just think it's such bs. I, I feel like really what it comes down to is, in this season of life, what is it that you need to make space for? And to be intentional about it and to communicate it.

Mm-hmm. It kind of goes back to, you know, those kind of key aspects, even in your own story. Just become aware of it and decide how you want to show up, right now, in this moment or in this season. 

You know, I, I tend to be what I call a sprinter.

Mm-hmm. Um, I do not run. The Mama does not run. But what I mean by sprinter is from a work perspective.

So sometimes I will have these sprints of time where I am all in and I have to do, many, many hours or um, just a big project or something like that. And I try to be be very good after each sprint to kind have a moment of let down.

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm. 

Tina Unrue: And if I know that the sprint is coming or that I can, if I'm planning for the sprint to come, then I try to communicate it to my partner and to my daughter, just so that everybody's clear. Like, okay.

Jenn Jouhseik: Mm-hmm. 

Tina Unrue: This is what's about to go down

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah. 

Tina Unrue: And this is why. And everybody just kind of, you understands and can get mm-hmm on the same page. And so no matter if you're, in a kind of nine to five job, no matter if you are a work at home mom or entrepreneurs like Jen and myself, the point is, is to get really intentional and communicate with those that you love about what's important to you what needs need to be met, and by whom, because we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to meet all the needs, and it doesn't have to always be us. We can hire even temporary help sometimes if we have to, or barter, have neighbors help, like whatever it is. I, I feel like we have a lot of opportunities as, as you've said. Where there's a challenge, there's often opportunity and mm-hmm. sometimes we can be blind to it, for sure. 

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah. 

Tina Unrue: So, so on that note, what opportunities do you feel are ahead for you and in your business?


[00:35:49] Looking ahead
---

Jenn Jouhseik: I made a pivot in my business during my step back and realizing what I wanted in life and balance and kind of creating space to do what feels good for me at the capacities that I feel are appropriate for me versus what someone else has defined.

And that was really scary because it's something that's different and I wasn't prepared for. But I think as an opportunity came up, I realized that that was the direction that felt the best for me and I've been loving so far. Um, so I made a pivot into a different service area where I started working on email marketing and email list management versus the one-on-one projects that I was doing.

Tina Unrue: Mm-hmm. 

Jenn Jouhseik: And at first was super scary. I didn't know what I was doing, but I think there was a level of excitement there where it's like, you know, when that passion that you have and you're pursuing it, it doesn't feel like work anymore. And it was something exciting, a new chapter. So with business, that's one of the opportunities that I'm exploring and I'm excited about that.

With life, I recently bought a home and I'm moving states again, so be moving to Florida and that is gonna be a new chapter as well, and really kind of being able to figure out what I want everything to kind of look like my day-to-day. Cuz lately, I think another thing is like your environment plays a huge role in what you do and you know, if you're not, happy with the surroundings and this can also change.

I mean, not everyone has the liberty to just and go, right? Um But being able to kind of insert things that make you happy, I think is important. And I realize that I still don't know anyone here in Austin. And so I'm moving to Florida because I know people out there and my family, some of my family's out there.

And um, that change I think would be a good thing for me to start kind of working different things into my life. And so that's an opportunity that I'm excited and looking forward to. Not the move itself, because that.

Tina Unrue: That's never fun. 

Jenn Jouhseik: No, but I think when faced with challenges, a, a quote that has really helped me is that it's not difficult, it's just something you're unfamiliar with at the moment. And I think that that's really helpful to know because sometimes we all hit a wall and we think that it's the worst thing, the whole world's ending, but it's just difficult at that time just because you don't know, it's new to you. And as you continue to move forward, , it becomes more and more familiar and it's easier to get through quicksand.

Tina Unrue: It's so true. Well said.

So you know, I'm excited for you and for everything that's ahead for you.

It sounds like a lot of adventure.

It sounds like perfectionism has no place in your travels. That's what it sounds like to me. And it sounds like your established morning routine definitely has a self pleasing prioritization over people pleasing.

So it sounds like, you know, you've, you know, after Burnout 2.0, if that's what we're gonna call it, right. Um, it definitely sounds like you're trying to really integrate life changes to find something that's more sustainable and aligned. And I love the word aligned. It's gonna come up often I feel in the podcast, um, because it really speaks to the need for us to have a feeling of of kind of continuity with all of ourselves. We are complex people. We are not just

Jenn Jouhseik: yeah. 

logical thinkers, even though we tend to, I think oftentimes resonate with being overthinkers. And we give a lot of power to this incredible tool that is our brain. But it is not the only player in our game and our body has a lot to say.

Tina Unrue: And so you are really leaning into that and following what feels good.

And I think that that's always a fantastic guidepost to be frank.

Jenn Jouhseik: Yeah. 

Tina Unrue: So if you had to share with everybody, um, what is mattering most to you in the season of life right now? 

Jenn Jouhseik: I think what matters most is to continue on this path of I guess it's kind of a mix of self-discovery and being selfish and going forward with what feels good because this will change all the time. You know, it's, there's so many factors that have a role in that and so what might feel good today might not feel good tomorrow, and that is something that is important to recognize and to kind of pivot and adjust where see fit.

And I think that being tune with your feelings and emotions, I think is very helpful to guide you through that process. And cuz everyone has their good days, their bad days, and, and being able to kind of just go with it, allow yourself to feel those emotions because they're not bad, right?

We, we feel a certain way because we feel a certain way. And to shut them is not a good thing. And to just let them take over is not a good thing either. But allow, um, everything in moderation, I think, and to be able to dig deep and try to figure out like why you're feeling that way. And I think once you're really attuned with that, you'll understand yourself a little better and that will impact and have waves in your life, your day-to-day, your relationships, the way that you think and the way that you react to certain things and, it'll help a lot. 

Tina Unrue: Well said, and a beautiful way to end our time together. If people would like to reach out, how would they best get in contact with you?

Jenn Jouhseik: You can visit my website at jouhco.com. Um, or you can find me on social media. Um, instagram is jouhco_ underscore, uh, feel free to send me a message, send me an email. I'm happy to continue the conversation. We can set up a call live as well. Um, I love meeting people and helping them. If I, if my story can resonate and help you, I would definitely love to explore that more and do what I can to make, I don't know the, the slightest impact I can. 

Tina Unrue: That's beautiful. That's exactly why we're here. We're here to grow ourselves certainly, but also to touch other people in a meaningful and deep and emotional way when we can. And I feel like everyone's paths cross for a reason. 

Jenn Jouhseik: I agree. 

Tina Unrue: And so I appreciate you offering that to everybody listening. I'll drop of course, all of your info in the show notes. And thank you again, Jenn, for being here. I appreciate it.

Jenn Jouhseik: Thank you for having me.

Tina Unrue: I felt that it was really important to share Jenn's story with you for two reasons. One is because when we share our stories, we allow others the opportunity to see themselves or learn and check in with themselves. Jenn shared when she went to a conference that she heard the speaker talking about their experience of burnout. And that prompted her to check in with herself. 

I think that it's incredibly important that we do that; that we not just hear stories, but we use them as an opportunity to ask ourselves the same thing. Is this happening to me? Is it possible? What would I do if it did happen to me? That's the power of sharing our stories. 

And the second reason that I thought it was really important to share Jenn's story was because she left one situation her corporate job to then start her own business. And unfortunately, had the same underlying patterns emerge. And I feel like a lot of us resonate with that. 

While there are things that can help make our lives easier and better, I argue that a lot of what ails us can be fixed when we look inside of ourselves. We need to start there. When we start within, then things outside of us start to magically feel better, look better. It's Wayne Dyer I think that says, when you change the way you look look at things, the things you look at change. And that just couldn't be more true. It couldn't be more true for me and and I would argue that's true for Jenn and everyone else that I interview on this podcast. 

So Jenn, thank you for sharing your story. It's an important one. And one that I think really just needs to be heard. And a lot of people will resonate. 

If you want to get in touch with Jenn, her information of course, is in the show notes. Even if you just want to say hi and say, thanks for sharing your story. I know that she would love to hear from you. As I would too. So feel free to drop me a message, connect with me on Instagram, or send me an email. I would love to hear from you.

If you enjoyed this episode, I would be deeply honored if you would leave us a review, share the podcast, rate the podcast just so that other mamas who might need to hear this message can find it and maybe get the same benefit that you did. Thank you all for being here. Thank you for daring to be selfish, and we hope to see you next time.


People on this episode